Alright it is a new year and I now have a new lease on life. As painful as it was, I have said goodbye to 2008 (note the sarcasm because 2008 was a real nail bitter for me).
I am feeling more like myself than I have for a while. This is partially due to the fact that I am not panicking anymore because I threw out almost everything in my cupboards and didn't know what to eat. It is also because I have decided to allow myself to be imperfect and be happy in the creating of life.
SO what do I want to be when I grow up? First of all, the biggest goal that I have is to be a lady like my Grandmother was. She dressed so simply but she alway's seemed to be elegant and beautiful. Maybe it was her beautifully coifed hair and always done makeup and beautiful manicured nails. I refuse though to coif my hair, I cannot stand manicured nails, but I think I can deal with makeup (a bit). As you all know if you have read my blog, I am somwhat of a gypsy and my apperance matches that most of the time.
Part of being a lady though is being lady like. That involves more than a straight back and a groomed appearance. To me being a lady involves being tactful in your speech to others and being mindful of what you say about others.
So along with being a lady, I would also like to be a writer. I don't know if I could be disciplined enough to sit down and write a whole book, but I do like to write, especially passionate short bursts of thought.
I also want to make a better habit of reading good books, including the standard works, because I hate to be bored with my own thoughts. I have been feeling too much of that lately (darn 2008). But no more!! Now all I need is a good mind expanding book to read and think about.
It would be great if I didn't have to work but if I do end up having to work I pray that it is with a good company and that I can still continue to teach my kids. I really have to figure out my Resume though because right now it really sucks.
I had a good day with my little son today BTW. We did his reading, writing and arithmetic. Then I started reading to him from Charlottes Web and we studied rain/snow, prisms and snowflakes. It was great!!
Anyway, I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but at least I know I don't want to be old. I know the years will come, but I don't want my outlook on life to become stale, grumpy and old. So here is to 2009, may I grow younger as I get older.